It makes me realize that before I was kind of an enabler for some bad stuff. For instance, I am, for all intents and purposes, a glutton. I love to eat, and when my mind gets set on something to eat, I will make it happen. And when I get that desired food I overeat. I eat enough for 3 people. And I'm usually so intent on getting the food (the usual culprits are pizza, nachos, ramen, lasagna, okonomiyaki, onion rings, and sushi) that I drag whomever is around into the whole thing. And when I eat enough for 3, they, by comparison, eat enough for 2.
The same goes for drinking. I love dark beer, I love hot sake, and I really love red wine. And I like to drink with friends. So I'll coerce the people around me to have a tipple, not that it's major arm twisting. But the truth of the matter is that if I didn't suggest it, it probably wouldn't happen.
And the same is true for sizes. When I go with someone to a cafe, and I order a medium and they order a small, I usually say, "Aw, c'mon, have a medium, I'll buy!"
I also make people eat desserts with me, because I am a cheesecake fanatic and feel lousy if I'm the only one eating the sweet stuff.
And that's the crappy thing, that all of this pushiness isn't about my friend or loved one having some good food and a good time, it's all about me. It's about making me feel better about overindulging. It's about avoiding guilt.
Well, I haven't been to a restaurant, had a drop of alcohol, or eaten anything sweet besides fruit for 19 days now, and I've noticed that because I've stopped enabling so many people that some of my close friends are actually losing weight. I'm the one making them feel guilty now, because I'm sticking to the PCP so closely. And that kind of sucks, I don't want anyone to feel guilty around me, but, at the same time, it's good not to eat that second serving, to avoid liquor, and to watch the sweets. So I guess it's better to be a health enabler than a glutton enabler.
But more valuable is the self knowledge this project has given me. When it's over, and July 23rd it will be over (as hard as that is to believe sometimes) I will definitely be more aware of how my choices affect those around me, and how, in turn, their choices affect mine.
1 comment:
I think many of us are guilty of this. My sister and I are AWFUL about talking each other into major food indulgences. I also used to hang with friends I knew would indulge a lot so I would not feel guilty about overdoing it when I used to drink.
I have encouraged friends to eat more, or go out with me in the first place a lot. It's interesting that you noticed this, but don't feel to bad patrick, you are soooo not alone on this kind of behavior!
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